Kinky Is Awesome

Kinky: "I'm not a liberal!"

2006-08-22T13:40:00.000-07:00

For months now, I have been fending off bed-wetting liberals who want to claim Kinky as one of their own.

I would show them that Kinky doesn't give a rat's a$$ about political correctness and that Kinky has run for office as a Republican and he's voted for Bush and he has immigration plans to satisfy the minutemen alongside school prayer plans to satisfy a Baptist minister, but still the liberals would not accept that Kinky is a dyed-in-the-wool conservative.

Even after I showed the liberals where Kinky said that the anti-war, anti-Lieberman wing of the Democratic Party is anti-American, those liberals still held fast to their misbelief that Kinky is a liberal.

Finally, we have an answer from Kinky Friedman himself:

"I'm not a liberal, believe me. I'm a compassionate redneck, far more conservative than I am liberal."

Kinky Says Liberals Aren't Pro-America

2006-08-12T23:11:00.000-07:00

On another excellent edition of Scarborough Country, Kinky came out in favor of Joe Lieberman leaving the Democratic Party and Kinky acknowledged that liberals aren't pro-America:

SCARBOROUGH: Hey, Kinky, could the argument be that both parties are extreme, vote for the new independent?

FRIEDMAN: That could certainly be. I think the mood of the country is really, really independent. I mean, I think the winds of change are really blowing right now. And all the—the way I see Lieberman, he's very—he's pro-America, unashamedly, and he's pro-Israel. And these liberals are not.

Amen, Kinky, amen!

Chose Kinky, Not Bell

2006-08-02T14:19:00.000-07:00

Look at Bell's record.

Starting in Houston, Bell's two big issues were (1) political corruption and (2) ethics reform. Well, goshdarn it, who is in favor of corruption and bad ethics? No one. Bell might have just as well begun his career by being in favor of puppies and ice cream. So what if Bell is against lobbyist abuses -- isn't everyone?

You should see Bell's record in Congress: click here. Bell was not some mainstream Democrat. Bell was a liberal who

voted NO on banning partial-birth abortion except to save mother’s life,

voted NO on forbidding human cloning for reproduction & medical research,

voted NO on Constitutional Amendment banning same-sex marriage,

voted NO on protecting the Pledge of Allegiance,

voted NO on speeding up approval of forest thinning projects,

voted NO on limiting medical malpractice lawsuits to $250,000 damages,

voted NO on capping damages & setting time limits in medical lawsuits,

voted NO on limited prescription drug benefit for Medicare recipients,

voted NO on reporting illegal aliens who receive hospital treatment, and

was rated 100% by SANE, indicating a pro-peace voting record,

rated 100% by NARAL, indicating a pro-choice voting record,

rated 93% by the AFL-CIO, indicating a pro-union voting record,

rated 8% by the Christian Coalition: an anti-family voting record, and

rated 0% by FAIR, indicating a voting record loosening immigration.

THAT is the record of a liberal and not a moderate.

Most importantly, Bell biggest claim to fame is being the whistleblower on Tom DeLay. Can you believe a grown man claiming that being a "tattle tale" is one of his biggest career accomplishments? Look at all the litigation that has resulted from the Bell-DeLay dispute: click here. Is litigation a good thing? Plus, I know some people don't think too highly of Tom DeLay, but no one can deny that he was a very strong leader for Texas and a leader in Congress who brought many valuable federal projects and jobs to Texas, and -- thanks to Bell -- we can kiss that goodbye.

Finally, look at Bell's campaign. He's for making small businesses pay higher wages and making businesses suffer more regulations. I wish Bell would tell us how that is going to bring jobs to Texas!

Bell is a liberal. Kinky is a moderate except where it comes to immigration and separation of church and state, and Kinky's strong conservative activism on those two topics is completely appropriate.

Kinky Ain't No Liberal!

2006-06-27T22:20:00.000-07:00

We've had some great comments here lately. Here's my thought from one discussion where we have been debating whether Kinky is a "liberal." I think the debate rises from the fact that Kinky often jokes that he's in favor of gay marriage because gays should be as miserable as the rest of us, but you have to take those joking comments in light of the fact that Kinky didn't vote against the amendment to the Texas Constitution which banned gay marriage. Anyway, here's my thoughts:

Let's be careful about how we use that word "liberal" here in Texas. I think you'd do Kinky less harm among Texas voters if you called Kinky a pedophile than if you called him a liberal. Texas is at least 60% Republican and if Kinky is going to win, he's going to have to do it with Republican votes (not by snipping off the pot-smoking fringe of the less-than-40%-of-voters Democratic Party because even if Kinky gets 33% of the Democrats -- which is unlikely -- that'd only get him about 13% of the vote).

Here is why I believe it is quite inaccurate to call Kinky a "liberal."

Watch this video clip. It is hilarious, it is true, and it is politically incorrect as hell. Liberal politicians are too politically correct to admit the truth that "negro is a charming word." Whatever Kinky is, he's NOT a liberal.

Next, read up on Kinky's get-tough illegal alien plan and his 5 Mexican generals plan. Kinky's common sense border security plan is the straight up "minuteman" approach, not Perry's namby-pamby "let's set up cameras" approach. Make no mistake, Kinky is the only candidate brave enough to say we need armed military generals on our southern border. This is not a liberal plan.

Now consider Kinky's party affiliation. Kinky has run for office in the past as a Republican and he voted for Bush/Cheney in 2004.

Here is an excerpt from Kinky's interview with Ruminator magazine confirms that he supported Bush's Middle East foreign policy:

Question: So does this idea of the honorable cowboy have anything to do with why you threw your support behind President Bush in this last election? You did, didn’t you?
Kinky: Yes. I did in this last election, but I didn’t vote for him the first time.
Question: Who did you vote for in 2000?
Kinky: I voted for Gore then. I was conflicted. . .but I was not for Bush that time. Since then, though, we’ve become friends. And that’s what’s changed things.
Question: So it’s your friendship with him that’s changed your mind about having him as president more than his specific political positions?
Kinky: Well, actually, I agree with most of his political positions overseas, his foreign policy. On domestic issues, I’m more in line with the Democrats. I basically think he played a poor hand well after September 11. What he’s been doing in the Near East and in the Middle East, he’s handling that well, I think.

Now maybe you are like me and you were worried that Kinky showed liberal tendencies by voting for a tree-hugger like Al Gore. Well, rest assured that Kinky was mistaken when he said that. Kinky's public voting records confirm he didn't vote for Al Gore in 2000 because Kinky didn't waste his vote on any candidate from 1994 to 2004 when he voted for Bush/Cheney.

Maybe you think Kinky's a liberal because he's a Jew. Rest assured, Kinky's views on religion are well to the right of Perry's. Kinky wants to take time during the school day for prayers in schools, and he wants to post the Ten Commandments in public school classrooms.

In summary, Kinky is NO LIBERAL! In fact, Kinky charts WELL TO THE RIGHT of Perry on the issues that matter most to Texas voters.

Choose Kinky, Not Perry

2006-06-01T07:12:00.000-07:00

This election will come down to a choice between Kinky and Perry.

Why?

Because the "Mean-Old-Granny" Strayhorn can't beat Perry with Republican voters and there aren't enough liberals in Texas to elect "DeLay-is-the-Devil" Bell.

I been looking at Perry's TV ad and it don't add up to me. Although I'm not generally a fan of the Lone Star Project, those fellas have all day to research, and they also applied their b"11$#!+ detector to Perry's ad and came to the same conclusion as me.

Perry's ad says "The average homeowner will receive a two thousand dollar tax cut."
Truth is an average home will get about $150 in property taxes in the first year.

Perry's ad says "We closed corporate loopholes."
Truth is banks, insurance, real estate, and mining companies got $1 billion in new loopholes.

Perry's ad says he's "protecting our job climate. The best in the nation."
Truth is the Texas job climate is 38th from best (worse than Oklahoma, yikes!).

10 Reasons Republicans Ought to Vote Kinky

2006-05-23T16:01:00.000-07:00

Some liberals support Kinky as a result of his views on biodiesel as an alternative fuel and his support for gay marriage, but there aren't too many liberals here in Texas (or hadn't you noticed) so Kinky needs to get the word out that he's got lots to offer Texas Republican voters.

Here's my official list of 10 reasons Texas Republicans should vote for Kinky (I stole this list from a whiney liberal, but I fixed it to take out the whining):

(1) Kinky has run for office in the past as a Republican,

(2) Kinky voted for Bush/Cheney in 2004,

(3) Kinky's interview with Ruminator magazine confirms that he supported Bush's Middle East foreign policy,

(4) Kinky's public voting records confirm he was mistaken when he said he voted for Gore in 2000,

(5) Kinky hasn't voted for a Democrat in any election at least from 1994 to 2004,

(6) Kinky wants to take time during the school day for prayers in schools,

(7) Kinky wants to post the Ten Commandments in public school classrooms,

(8) Kinky is not obsessed with political correctness,

(9) Kinky knows how to deal with illegal aliens from Mexico, and

(10) Kinky’s immigration policy of hiring Mexican generals to police our border is a great idea that John McCain has endorsed.

Well, that's my top 10 list and I didn't even include the fact that Perry just signed the biggest tax increase in Texas history.

Step Away from the Stop Kinky Blog

2006-05-19T11:33:00.000-07:00

A warning from Laura Stromberg, who is Kinky's spokeslady:

"Some of you may be aware of a blog called "Stop Kinky" that is
dedicated to, well, stopping Kinky.

I won't even get into the various falsities and inaccuracies one can
find throughout this particular blog, but I would like to ask all who
are tempted to rise to Kinky's defense to consider doing this instead:
absolutely nothing.

I'm a tremendous fan of blogs, and I believe there are some incredibly
good ones out there. But this particular blog is nothing more than one
man's slanted and very personal agenda, and we hope that it receives
as little attention as possible."

Kinky "Gets It" About Political Correctness

2006-05-08T12:41:00.000-07:00

Kinky is a genius. With all the politicians in Texas acting like officers in the political correctness police, Kinky promisses to "de-wussify Texas."

According to a recent story in the Austin American Statesman, Kinky is smart enough to realize "the more people I offend, the more people will like me."

Here are some other gems from that story:

"That's the problem with politicians; they don't want to offend anybody. In so doing, though, they offend all of us." Friedman later questioned any conflict between cracking wise and delivering a message voters weigh seriously. "I'm not a politician," he said. "I'm a compassionate redneck; relate to me different than these guys or you won't get accurate results."

...

In a November CNBC interview, for instance, he was pressed on a line in his 1987 novel, "A Case of Lone Star," comparing New York to "a Negro talking to himself." Friedman said he saw nothing wrong and even said of sexual predators: "Throw them in prison and throw away the key and make them listen to a Negro talking to himself." Video excerpts appeared online on the Burnt Orange Report, a pro-Democrat blog.

Good stuff. I saw the video, and it's hilarious! Check it out!

When the politically correct principal at a Texas public school told Kinky he couldn't have his cigar on campus while he was addressing the students, Kinky dared the principal to call the sheriff because he wasn't going to give up his stogie.

Here's a story about it in the Fort Worth Star-Telegram:

Based on a Zogby International poll last month for The Wall Street Journal, Perry has about one-third of the vote. Democrat Chris Bell and Comptroller Carole Keeton Strayhorn, an independent, both have about 20 percent, with Friedman close behind.

Apparently, Kinky gained votes after he was caught last month committing a heinous violation of Texas liquor laws by drinking a Guinness in a moving car during a St. Patrick's Day parade.

Now he's in trouble again.

A school administrator stopped him on his way into a high school in the Hill Country town of Ingram.

Friedman, as always, was smoking his trademark cigar.

It's against state law to smoke or dip tobacco on school property. The cigar had to go out.

But the administrator told him that under a local policy, he couldn't even carry it.

They agree on what Kinky said next: "Call the sheriff."

Nevertheless, Friedman spoke with the cigar.

Kinky "Gets It" About Foreign Policy

2006-05-06T21:00:00.000-07:00

Kinky spoke with Ruminator Magazine about his thoughts on Bush's foreign policy:

Ruminator: So does this idea of the honorable cowboy have anything to do with why you threw your support behind President Bush in this last election? You did, didn’t you?

Kinky: Yes. I did in this last election, but I didn’t vote for him the first time....I was not for Bush that time. Since then, though, we’ve become friends. And that’s what’s changed things.

Ruminator: So it’s your friendship with him that’s changed your mind about having him as president more than his specific political positions?

Kinky: Well, actually, I agree with most of his political positions overseas, his foreign policy....I basically think he played a poor hand well after September 11. What he’s been doing in the Near East and in the Middle East, he’s handling that well, I think.

Kinky "Gets It" About Illegal Mexican Aliens

2006-05-05T13:01:00.000-07:00

I just saw a story in the Texarkana Gazette that showed me Kinky Friedman gets it. Here's what Texas governor candidate Kinky said about the illegal Mexican alien problem:

"Mexico is not a poor country...all of these politicians are afraid of offending Hispanics. I want the border off the evening news until we get something resolved."

Kinky's been saying that Mexico ain't poor for better than a year now. Here's a another story out of the Kilgore News Herald, where Kinky says "Mexico is not a poor country."

Here's some other interesting stuff out of that story:

"He proposes auctioning Texas sports funding to the highest bidder -- Nike or Coca Cola or Adidas or some other corporation that would like the opportunity to “get their hooks into the athletes while they’re still young.”

...

“I am going to see non-denominational prayer and the Ten Commandments put back in the schools.”

Friedman said the Ten Commandments might have to be called the ten rules or something similar but they need to be back in the schools. “They say this is part of my wussification campaign but, as my spiritual advisor Billy Jo Schafer says, “If you don’t love Jesus, go to hell.”

One of Friedman’s most unusual ideas addresses border security.

He proposes creating what he calls the Five Mexican Generals plan. As he lays it out, the border with Mexico would be divided into five pieces with a Mexican general responsible for each. A $1 million trust fund would be created for each general.

“When I talk about the five Mexican generals, people think I’m joking but I’m dead serious,” said Friedman. “I will divide the border into five jurisdictions, assigning one Mexican general to each and providing a trust fund for that general. Every time a person crosses illegally, we subtract $5,000 from the trust fund.”